Fatherhood issues

[kg271]

Hi all,

We're in the final run in, 4 weeks to go until the birth of my son, who will be our first child.

Any hints or tips on dealing with this life changing even greatly appreciated.

My main issue is that my mrs and the rest of her family are blues, and as none of my family really like football i'm concerned that i'll be the only person wanting him start life without feeling disadvantaged.

[user name]

go to bed for a week... seriously... you'll never know sleep like it for the next 10 years at least... :)

[North Wales Red]

Make sure the baby's cot is on the side on which your partner sleeps or it will be you doing the nightly feeds.

[NeverOffside]

The last thing on your mind when he's born will be what football team he supports :)

[kg271]

The last thing on your mind when he's born will be what football team he supports :)

True, which is why i need a plan from now:)

[Bandersnatch]

Make sure the baby's cot is on the side on which your partner sleeps or it will be you doing the nightly feeds.

Depends on how much of a bastard you are!
My one tip for any impending/new parent is:
Don't wish one minute of your precious bundle's life away ie when they're a week old don't say "can't wait till he's big enough to wear a liverpool kit" enjoy when they're learning to talk and saying things that make no sense to anyone except them. Our youngest is 2 and still calls Spongebob- "bobenday".
Parenthoods a rollercoaster-Enjoy the ride!

Oh yeah, Congrats also!

[ManCalledHorse]

Hi all,

We're in the final run in, 4 weeks to go until the birth of my son, who will be our first child.

Any hints or tips on dealing with this life changing even greatly appreciated.

My main issue is that my mrs and the rest of her family are blues, and as none of my family really like football i'm concerned that i'll be the only person wanting him start life without feeling disadvantaged.

There was a thread (I think in TTWAR) where someone asked the same question (well not about the birth of your son, but anyway). There was lots of (mainly) good advice on there so you should take a look.

And congratualtions :)

Edit: In fact this thread...

http://forums.lfconline.com/showthread.php?t=62594

[North Wales Red]

Depends on how much of a bastard you are!
My one tip for any impending/new parent is:
Don't wish one minute of your precious bundle's life away ie when they're a week old don't say "can't wait till he's big enough to wear a liverpool kit" enjoy when they're learning to talk and saying things that make no sense to anyone except them. Our youngest is 2 and still calls Spongebob- "bobenday".
Parenthoods a rollercoaster-Enjoy the ride!

Oh yeah, Congrats also!

She was the bastard I'm afraid.Still is.

[Bandersnatch]

She was the bastard I'm afraid.Still is.

well Amy's cot is on my side but we took it in turns pretty much(she did more I'd say) Thing is until we finish baby's room she still spends half the night in our bed. I think she's protecting her status as last born!!:D

[RedInBrazil]

Be strong, but fair, but most of all, always be there for your children.

[the mighty swin]

'Twas I that asked the question on the other thread. And seeing as I now have over 18 weeks worth of experience!!!!;) I feel that I can pass on all the knowledge that I have gleaned.

Best bit of advice for the actual day that was given to me was to watch the machine that's attached to the missus. This shows the baby's heartbeat and the missus' contractions. The higher the number the bigger the contraction. But you'll soon get to know how high it's going to go. I was able to tell the missus when the contraction was starting and when it was over it's peak - an immeasurable help apparently!

We've been dead lucky - we've had two sleepless nights and they were early on. (obviously very early on we had to do a feed in the night but if you can time it so that there's 1 feed at say midnight that you do, get the missus to do the middle of the night feed 3/4 oclock and you do the first one in the morning - everyone get's a decent stretch of sleep!! Invaluable.

Try and be relaxed as you can, the baby is so laid back it's untrue, but I'm convinced that's because that's the vibe she's picked up from us.

Be aware that in the first couple of days your lad will start to vomit up all kinds of shit. Ours started doing it in the middle of the night, almost like convulsing, I was set to throw her in the car and drive at light speed up to the hospital whilst still in my jockeys. Next morning the mid-wife calls round and goes, matter of factly, "Oh yeah, that's normal, she's just getting the gunk out of their system." And you're left thinking, and you couldn't have let us know what was to come?

Sorry, gone on too much.

Don't go up to the hospital until the missus is practically crippled with pain from the contractions. Everyone says they send you back home - they do!

Good luck kg! Hope all goes well for you.

[Senior Rafa]

It all depends, My first slept all the time and only woke once a night for a feed.
But the second did'nt know the word sleep.
The only advice i can give you is embrace it with open arms, my girls are 4 and 5 now and they are the best thing that ever happened to me.
Just enjoy every day, even the bad days as you will look back and all you will remember are fond memories.
All the best as your life will never be the same again....It will be a whole lot better.

[red brick]

Now is the easy part really.(If you can live on little sleep). The fun really starts when they get to 2-3. My 3 year old was sent home from playgroup today with an incident letter. He apparently tried to flood the toilets after climbing in the water pool.:eek::D

[RedWanderer]

Got a one-year old and, like you, another on the way shortly.

My advice would be that you should just relax a bit and not try to worry over every little detail. What seems really important at the moment (like what color to paint the baby's room, or how to protect your valuable breakables) will soon be rendered totally unimportant, as the baby will throw spaghetti all over whatever color it is, and smash the antique floor lamp to boot. Just learn to laugh at it (harder than it sounds!!).

Oh, and this is just my personal experience, so it may not work for every child, but I think if you and the missus are on the same page you really can get them to sleep through the night, say 3-4 months in. The first night you do this is awful - they're used to getting fed as soon as they cry, so they scream their heads off for an hour or so. The second night, if you held firm, they still cry a good bit, but they start to learn it's a waste of time, and by four or five nights, they don't even bother and just roll over and go back to sleep. Of course, the first few months you have to feed them whenever they want, but your doc will soon tell you it's OK to put them on a schedule, and it's well worth the effort to do. Trust me, getting up at 3 am every night gets old very quickly.

I know some will say it didn't work for them, but I have friends who couldn't take listening to the screaming that first night or two, gave in, and now their kid is 18 months old and they still get up every single night! I shudder when I hear that. Not all kids are the same, though, so yours might end up like Senior Rafa's - not even know what sleep is. Not much you can do about that except lose sleep. Yikes.

Whatever you decide on that and other issues, you'll love being a father. It's a fantastic gift - enjoy it!

[Taksin]

True, which is why i need a plan from now:)

I now have an Evertonian nephew even though most of his family contact is with reds.. I tried my best to give him a life of happiness but his dad had the casting vote. It seemed a bit like an abuse of his civil rights at the time, but I've made my peace with the situation now..

What I can't actually physically believe is that my sister went over to the dark side in order to 'support her husband and son'..

[redforever]

My advice to you mate is not to worry too much and expect the unexpected. I hope everything goes ok and the most important thing is that they are both healthy. Childbirth is traumatic and painful and comes with risks. I wish you all the best mate,your life will change forever.

[kemlynreds]

Enjoy it, it's awesome makes you realise what you were born for.

At the birth stand at the screaming end.

[Matt R]

For the hospital stretch, make sure you've got a change of clothes. Its fucking hot in there, especially if you are in the Womens.

If you're not needed, get the fuck out of the way of the people who know what they're doing.

Don't worry about bringing your child up well, or about being a bad dad. You'll be fine. By my reckoning, at least 50% of the population are as thick as fuck, and they manage to get through it pretty much unscathed. If they can, you can and more.

The most important bit of advice I can give you is to have nappies and wipes in every single room in the house, as you're liable to have shit up to your elbows quite a lot.

Ebjoy it, its more fun than you can imagine.

[candyman]

I now have an Evertonian nephew even though most of his family contact is with reds.. I tried my best to give him a life of happiness but his dad had the casting vote. It seemed a bit like an abuse of his civil rights at the time, but I've made my peace with the situation now..

What I can't actually physically believe is that my sister went over to the dark side in order to 'support her husband and son'..

I have 3 nephews. Their dad is a Chelsea fan and my brother is a Chelsea fan. My sister is neutral (they're her kids) but has a soft spot for Liverpool. I turned the eldest as soon as he was old enough to know what football was. Bought him a Liverpool kit, which his little brother then wanted, and taught him some songs which he'd go back to his dad and sing.

Now 2 of them are Liverpool (they're 7 and 4) and I'll be working on the youngest as soon as he's old enough (he's 15 months), although my brother said he's going to make sure he gets this one.

[simon pieman]

Enjoy it, it's awesome makes you realise what you were born for.

At the birth stand at the screaming end.

This is so true , best advice on here for along time.Enjoy your child and be proud of everything they do or say,within reason, but don't forget that when they do something wrong you where young once and your parents had similar dilemas with you.Goodluck you will need it.;):D

[the mighty swin]

At the birth stand at the screaming end.

But you soon realise just how little distance there is between the screaming end and the Somme end. I went into the labour room under the impression the missus was about 14ft long. There is very little escape from all the blood and guts and cutting and squirting. (etc).

[simon pieman]

But you soon realise just how little distance there is between the screaming end and the Somme end. I went into the labour room under the impression the missus was about 14ft long. There is very little escape from all the blood and guts and cutting and squirting. (etc).

That part there the cutting makes my guts turn.Thank god we are mostly men ehh ;)

[kemlynreds]

In which case ask the midwife to throw another stitch in, you never know when it will come in handy ;)

[istanbully bob]

Enjoy it, it's awesome makes you realise what you were born for.

At the birth stand at the screaming end.


Top advice that,I don't know why women make all this fuss over being in labour, it was MY hand that was being squeezed beyond all recognition.
It's the greatest feeling in the world though so just try & enjoy the moment,I hope everything goes ok for all of you & (I think it was billy connolly once said):



"Childbirth.....It's marvellous,it's miraculous & it's amazing but it is not a spectator sport......




DON'T VIDEO RECORD IT!";)

[kemlynreds]

Your not Xabi are you?

[MarbleRed]

But you soon realise just how little distance there is between the screaming end and the Somme end. I went into the labour room under the impression the missus was about 14ft long.

Made me laugh out loud that! Made the Mrs read it, worked again!

We've got 6 months to go.....:eek: